From Avoidance to Embrace

As children, we were often taught to avoid conflict at all costs. We were told to be nice, to make friends, and to avoid confrontation. But what if that approach ends up handicapping us socially and mentally? According to Robert Greene, that's exactly what happens.

Greene argues that those who avoid conflict or have overprotective parents cannot develop the skills necessary to navigate the complexities of human relationships. They cannot stand up for themselves, negotiate, and protect themselves in difficult situations. As a result, they are more vulnerable to being taken advantage of and less likely to succeed.

This is not to say that conflict is always desirable or that we should go out of our way to create enemies. But it is essential to recognize that conflict can be therapeutic and help us grow and learn. By engaging in conflict, we can understand what works, what doesn't, and how to protect ourselves.

So how can we healthily embrace conflict? First, we must learn how to stand up for ourselves. This means setting boundaries, saying no when necessary, and asserting our needs and desires. It also means being willing to listen to others, negotiate, and compromise when appropriate.

We also need to learn how to deal with challenging people and situations. This means developing our emotional intelligence, practicing empathy, and learning how to communicate effectively. It also means being willing to confront difficult situations head-on rather than avoiding them or hoping they will go away on their own.

Finally, we need to learn how to protect ourselves in conflict. This means developing physical and emotional resilience, learning to de-escalate situations, and knowing when to walk away. It also means being willing to seek help when necessary, whether talking to a friend, seeking therapy, or contacting the authorities.

In short, conflict is not something to be feared or avoided. It is an opportunity to learn, grow, and protect ourselves. By healthily embracing conflict, we can develop the skills and resilience necessary to navigate life's challenges confidently and succeed. So the next time you find yourself in a conflict, don't shy away. Embrace it, learn from it, and use it as an opportunity to become stronger and more resilient.